What did you Commit to?

Posted on April 15, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

I had an experience yesterday that humbled me and made me let go of some old thoughts about my past. As a result, I can no longer kid myself about having not made it as a professional actress.

Three of the most successful actors who went to school with me at the University of Houston Theatre Department came to Houston yesterday to honor Mr. Cecil Pickett, one of the most beloved acting teachers that UH ever had. Mr. Pickett was a true genius at directing and teaching acting. His teachings were as excellent as any of the modern day acting coaches who became famous in New York. And we all knew it, even in the 1970s when I was in his classes.

Dennis Quaid, Brett Cullen and Robert Wuhl shared the stage with Pickett’s daughter Cindy Pickett who also has made a name for herself in movies and in soap operas. The four of them reminisced about the training they received from Mr. Pickett, the tough criticism and the brilliant methods he taught. Their stories brought back my own memories of being in Mr. Pickett’s classes, reminding me of how fortunate I was to have been his student for three years. I learned so much that I later passed on to hundreds of my own acting students.

Here’s the humbling part. None of them remembered me. Although I was in the same classes with them, they did not seem to recall my name or face. It made me confront the fact that I had not fully shown up in those classes. I did not have the same level of commitment to stand out that they had. It would be easy to say I just did not have the same level of talent that they did. But that is not really it. The truth is that I was too scared at that time in my life to take the risks that they did.

The other big lesson for me came from Dennis and Brett who both said that they had been committed to succeed as actors. They would not take no for an answer. While Brett got a TV series within two weeks of moving to LA, Dennis waited a year to get and agent and then another year before getting a role in a movie. Neither gave up no matter what happened. Brett revealed that he has been financially broke several times, but would not quit.

I on the other hand gave up way too soon! I did not have their commitment to succeed at acting professionally. I do not make myself wrong for this, I just need to be honest with myself about it. My commitment has been to self-awareness and spiritual psychology. I have been 100% committed to transform my life and to help others transform through teaching acting, voice, public speaking and communication skills.

It was a great experience to see my classmates talk about their success and the struggles that they encountered along the way. I am proud to say I knew them, even if they don’t remember me. And I am glad to come to terms with the fact that I took another path.

So, what have you been committed to that has brought you to where you are now? And is there anything you need to acknowledge that you did not do or become because you were not really committed to it after all?

Experiential Learning: Learning by Doing

Posted on March 25, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

Learning by doing is different from learning with the intellect where you are collecting concepts. When learning intellectual concepts, you can go as fast as your mind can grasp the concepts. But, just because you can grasp the concept does not mean you can do the skill associated with that concept.

When you need to learn to be able to do something or to be something, you must go slower. You have to slow down so that you can practice the skill and integrate your physical and emotional aspects into the skill being learned. If you go too fast, you may understand the concept but you won’t be able to do it comfortably.

I just flashed back to a time when I was hired by a radio station on Maui to read the news on the air. The station manager wanted to use me for more than the reading news. He thought I could run the remote sound board while a DJ was out in the field. He asked one of the old-hand DJs to teach me to run the sound board. This guy went over the dials and buttons, switches and levers for two days with me. Then the third day, they put me in the studio to run the board while a DJ went out to a shopping mall to broadcast his show. I completely messed up the broadcast. I froze and did not know what to do with all those dials and switches. The poor DJ was out there with no support for his show. That experience was so disastrous for me and the radio station that I can’t even recall what happened. Someone must have come in to take over, because I could not run that board. I needed to learn slowly, step by step. I needed someone to break it down for me and teach me one step at a time instead of explaining all the equipment.

Public speaking is the kind of skill that needs to be learned slowly and in step-by-step fashion. Seems to me that many presentation teachers tell you what to do; then, they ask you to get up and do it. Of course then, they tell you want is wrong with what you just did. That is learning by critiquing what is wrong.

I like to guide people through slow steps, breaking complex subtle skills like getting comfortable in your skin into a process that allows people to make discoveries for themselves. If you want people to learn to be comfortable, then start by making it right that they are not comfortable and work to add skills that allow them to experience comfort. I don’t want to give away all my secrets to my Zimmer Method, but I do start with allowing people to feel the discomfort. Instead of running away or covering it up, we let it be a part of the experience. Then we do a series of exercises that allow comfort to come in until they are experiencing comfort being in front of a group. So they learn by doing to be comfortable. No speaking yet, just getting comfortable.

Once people can experience some comfort, then they can learn to connect. After that, they learn to think on their feet. Still not giving talks yet! Each step of the way gives them plenty of time to learn to do the next step. By the time, we get to speaking, they are so ready to talk! Their stories and ideas come bursting forth from them, because they have learned by doing. It takes time to learn by doing, but the reward is that a person can really do it!

Great Article on Why Public Speaking Scares You by Susan Adams at Forbes.com

Posted on March 12, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

I just read an article on Forbes called “Why Public Speaking Scares and and How to Overcome your Fear” by Susan Adams.

This is one of the best articles on fear of speaking I have seen in a long time!

I am a presentation and speaking coach in Houston. I have specialized in transforming stage fright and fear of public speaking for over 23 years.

My experience has taught me that the real fear of speaking is fear of feeling in front of folks and not feeling safe to use the natural emotional energy positively. As Susan Adams suggests, there is a deeper fear than just fear of speaking under the surface.

In each case in this article, the author Susan Adams and presentation coach Jane Praeger demonstrated how to address the emotion underlying the fear of speaking. Once the emotions are authentically expressed in a positive way, the feelings of fear and dread transform into power and passion, energy and enthusiasm to share.

My Zimmer Method utilizes this principle to transform stage fright into authentic presence. I invite interested readers to explore my unique understanding about stage fright at http://www.self-expression.com/what_is_stagefright.shtml. Ifcurious, visit my class description page to get a sense of what is different about my programs.

Thanks to Susan and Jane for this very helpful article!

Want to Speak like Steve Jobs?

Posted on February 28, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

I had never seen Steve Jobs talk before; but after he died, I heard lots of people rave about the way he spoke in public. It seemed like many people thought he was the epitome of a great speaker.

Then I began reading his biography Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson. Before even finishing a quarter of the book, I realized that his style would have come naturally from who he was and the passions that he followed. Intuitively, I guessed that his style would have aligned with what and how I teach public speaking. Steve would not have followed an old style speech formula because he did everything from his inner guidance. He was a student of meditation and Zen. He followed systems that lead to self-awareness, palpable presence and being in the moment. He studied with Shunryu Suzuki who wrote Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind one of my favorite books. Steve also followed his heart and trusted where that would lead him. He learned to use his spiritual energy to magnetize and hold people’s attention. He was a force of nature and used his intensity to persuade others to do what he wanted.

His biography was so compelling that I decided to view some of his speeches to see for myself what all the raving was all about. I had an inkling that my Zimmer Method Speaking from the Heart program might be exactly what is needed to help others learn to speak like Steve. So, I watched and was excited to see that Steve’s style was exactly what I teach and what my clients learn to do! I reviewed two Steve jobs talks that exemplify his authentic style – The iPad Keynote from January 27, 2110 and his 2005 Stanford Commencement Address. If you are interested, watch these two videos and you will see what I am about to illuminate about Steve’s style. I am providing links so that you can go right to the YouTube videos of each talk.

The 2005 Stanford Commencement Address

Steve starts by clearing out his worst fear that people will judge him for never having graduated college. He uses an impact statement of self-revelation that is at once vulnerable and delightfully humorous, “Truth be told, I never graduated from college. This is the closest thing I have ever gotten to a college graduation.” If you want to be an authentic speaker, you have to stand “naked” and share your real, right now fears. That frees you, as it did Steve, from tension and actually endears you to your listeners. Then, he shares his stories. “I want to tell you three stories from my life. That’s it. No big deal, just three stories.” Steve delivers a talk that inspires because it simply tells three authentic stories from his life that he knows will speak to his listeners, the 2005 graduates of Stanford University. No cover-up, no making himself look perfect, just his naked stories and what he learned from his experiences. So simple, so pure, so real, so Steve.

I believe in a little structure and a lot of flow when speaking to groups. Structure should be simple and easy to remember. Story, Lesson and Point. Watch this video of the Stanford commencement address and see how beautifully he weaves story with lesson and point to inspire not only his graduating audience but also the millions who have watched this talk on YouTube. See how it all makes a simple point to “Find what you love. Follow your heart!” Today as I watch this video while writing this article, I see a comment from one month ago by someone who wrote with tears in his eyes that he was inspired to follow his heart because of this video.

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Famous vs Great

Posted on February 21, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

Martin Luther King Jr. was quoted as saying, “Not everyone can be famous, but everyone can be great because greatness is determined by service.” Does it seem to you that many of us in America are struggling with a misplaced desire to be famous? Do you harbor a secret wish to have your name in lights or to have lots of people know your name? I have to admit that I have a bit of this desire myself. I don’t want to have it, but I do. And I wrestle with my secret desire because I think it is not really right for me.

When I saw Dr. King’s quote, it eased my mind. It is not so much I want to be famous, as I want to be great. I want to make a contribution that matters to as many people as I can. I love to make a difference! Something keeps pushing me to share my ideas and insights in any way I can, like in this blog. This seems like a good thing to reach for contribution by sharing my unique perspective on life.

As much as I have worked on self-expression, communication and presentation skills, I know I can express more. The more for me, though, needs to come from deeper and deeper places as I explore my inner reality. In the last three years, I have taken an even deeper journey into meditation than ever before. And my journey inward has been opening greater awareness of the spiritual force that is in all of us. I want to share more of the ways that I see things from this deeper viewpoint. That, I believe is where greatness comes from. Dr. King was great because he followed his inner calling. The same goes for all who have been great throughout history.

Fame is a quality of being known, but just being known by lots of people does not mean you are great. Greatness is a quality of knowing who you are, why you are here and having the courage to express yourself authentically from the truest place you can connect with inside. When you do that you can’t help but serve. Your very Being serves others by calling them to authenticity.

One of my heroes is Gerry Spence, a great trial lawyer who speaks from his heart zone to advocate for his clients in the courtroom. In one of his books, I can’t recall which, Gerry says he is not afraid of skilled trial attorneys with lots of experience. He is afraid of the young, tender, lady lawyer who shakes visibly as she speaks from her heart to share her client’s story. He is afraid of her because he knows the power that authenticity has over listeners. People can sense the truth when they hear it. Her greatness is her vulnerability to be honest.

I have been teaching public speaking for about 23 years now. And the one thing that remains true from 23 years of speaking classes, is that it has always been the person who was most scared, who ended up speaking in a way that moved us most deeply in class. The person who ended up as a great speaker was the one who had the most fear. I have assumed that was because those people had the most feeling, their feelings were up to the surface where they can be used to create genuine connection with listeners.

So, maybe we all need to redefine what it means to be great. Greatness, according to Dr. King, is a measure of service. And service is simply sharing who we are with others.

The Voice

Posted on February 13, 2012February 13, 2012 by Sandra Zimmer

I must confess I am a bit addicted to performance competition shows like The Voice and American Idol. I love to see emerging talent shine. I think my attraction is wishing that I had pursued my singing more fully. The truth was it was way too scarey to sing in front of groups when I was taking singing lessons in my 20s and 30s. To sing well, your body has to be completely open to allow the vibration to flow through. That is both a physiological openess and a spiritual one. I admire the young people who can be so open to sing from their hearts and souls in any arena, especially a big one like these shows.

Storyselling – The secret to a successful persuasive presentation is great storytelling.

Posted on February 5, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

I am in love with this word – storyselling! It says it all about the power of stories to persuade listeners to buy products and services or buy into ideas.

Storyselling is the act of telling the authentically persuasive story. It is sharing the story that excites others to say, “Yes, I want that!”

Everyone now knows that people make buying decisions emotionally and then justify with their rational mind. Telling others about the features and benefits of your idea, product or service often is just not effective enough to motive others to take action. You have to say something that moves them emotionally. What causes people to feel moved is the story about how your idea, product or service caused a transformation for someone else, for instance, another client.

Transformation makes the idea, product or service more meaningful, more valuable. So find your authentically persuasive story, share that story and then finish with how the story is relevant for your listener. Watch how storyselling increases your ability to persuade listeners to see things your way or to buy what you are offering.

YOU on VIDEO Workshop – If Warren Buffett can do it so can YOU

Posted on February 3, 2012February 3, 2012 by Sandra Zimmer

Have you been holding back from making videos due to fear of making a fool of yourself? Maybe not looking good? Or seeming silly?

Warren Buffett isn’t!

You already know that video can boost your career, your product or service. And it is totally FUN!

Take look at Warren Buffett having fun on video and making a huge gesture of friendship to all the people in China. To celebrate Chinese New Year, he appeared on national TV in China and sang “I’ll Be Working On The Railroad” while strumming his ukulele.

Don’t believe me? Watch it.

His video got picked up in the United States by MSNBC and other networks. Had Buffett delivered a traditional New Year’s greeting, it would have been expected, but not so newsworthy.

Want to learn to be at ease on video for YouTube, Skype and TV? Join Kenan Branam and me March 9 and 10 for YOU on VIDEO WORKSHOP. See details.

Three Great Presentation Skills that Make the Winning Difference

Posted on January 22, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

Next week I am facilitating a day-long training program for sales professionals in the world’s fifth largest software company. Unlike my usual clients who feel fear of speaking, these folks will be good at
speaking and selling. They are already very successful. So, “What,” I wondered “Do they need from me?”

They need me to focus on the three most important skills forbpresenting – personal presence, genuine connection and telling the authentically persuasive story. Why do I consider these the most important presentation skills? Because, with these three skills, they can magnetize listeners to them and dazzle prospective clients with the mysterious energy of chemistry. And so can you.

Personal Presence is the power that you have when you are totally here in this moment. Presence is created by relaxing deeply into your body so that you are fully grounded. When you are grounded in your body, your physical presence creates a magnetic pull that attracts others to you. Very important for a presenter to be pulling people’s attention to them! A simple grounding exercise can help you develop presence. Try my grounding CD or MP3 audio.

Genuine Connection is the power of being with listeners while you are at the center of attention. To
connect genuinely, you must see one person and allow that person to see you so that a two way exchange of attention is created, one person at a time. To do so, use your eyes softly to establish receptive eye contact. Land your eyes softly on one person at a time as you speak and drink each person in through your eyes. This simple technique invites people to pay attention to you and also draws them to you magnetically. More
than anything else, this causes chemistry to happen with audiences. Rather than projecting yourself out to listeners, receive them as if you are pulling their energy in to you. It feels like loving your audience and allowing yourself to be loved by them.

Tell the Authentically Persuasive Story to engage, enchant and convince. Tell the story with heart, the story that makes people say, “Yes, I want that. I’ll have what he is having!” You know the story. It is the one where your product or service made a major difference for a client. Revel in the telling of that story.

Yesterday, one of my new clients sent me an email telling the following story.

We rehearsed for three presentations this week. The teams were awesome. We had two interviews in one day today. At our VP’s suggestion we used your Grounding Exercise video to get the team “grounded” between the two presentations. Our company owner did the exercise with team. It was very effective. Thanks. Also, we were told after our first presentation today, by an Owner’s Representative that he
had sat through 11 presentations last week. All were by companies larger and broader based than ours. He said that our presentation was by far “better than any of those companies” and that it was the “best he had ever seen”. I thought you would want to know that you are having a positive impact on our company. We appreciate that.

Will I tell this story in the near future? You bet! What is the story you want to tell to help sell your company? If I can help you tell that story, I’d be delighted!

Keep Dreaming

Posted on January 16, 2012December 25, 2014 by Sandra Zimmer

Today is Martin Luther King Day. He had a dream. Much if his dream has come true. His legacy lives in all of us. Even if we do not have complete equality, we have come so far. Only 200 years ago, we fought a war to end slavery.

This weekend, my family laid my father’s body to rest. He was a quiet man, but a man of power. Not in the usual way that we think of power, but in a quiet, present way. He had the heart of a servant. He was always there to support and to guide me if I asked for help, never to tell me what to do. He too spoke of dreaming. All my life he reminded me to dream, so that I could create. Dreaming was a way of starting to plan what you want to create.

What is your dream? If you don’t have one, take some time to dream today. Dream up a dream.