How to Solve Public Speaking Fear

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Solve Public Speaking Fear

In order to solve public speaking fear, you must first understand what public speaking fear is really about. What public speaking fear is really about may surprise you. What it is not about may also surprise you.

What we call fear of public speaking is not really about speaking. Most people who experience stage fright or public speaking fear know how to speak.  They speak every day about their ideas, insights and expertise.  When someone asks them for help, they respond immediately. Words flow effortlessly to help the person who is asking for help.

What public speaking fear is really about is not being comfortable at the center of attention of groups. People with fear of public speaking simply have not learned to be comfortable being who they are in front of groups.

Typically, one-on-one they are fine. However, once it becomes a group, they don’t feel safe being who they are. So they can’t speak with the same comfort that they do to one person. Suddenly, they feel incapable of speaking and think they are not good at public speaking. The real fear is not of speaking, but of showing who they really are to a group. That means showing their true thoughts and feelings. Underneath this fear is a belief that who they really are is not not perfect and therefore unacceptable.

April’s Story

Every day, I coach professionals who say they are not good at public speaking. Often, in one hour, I prove to them that they are good at speaking by teaching them to relax deeply into their physical bodies through an exercise that allows them to feel grounded in their bodies. Grounding creates a sense of comfort, confidence and being collected, all of which allows speech to flow more freely.

Just last week, I met with a young woman named April who works for a mortgage company. April is a skilled loan officer who understands how to guide investors through complex lending processes to help them succeed. She is one of those people mentioned above who can open her mouth and let ideas flow effortlessly when someone asks for help. Yet, when her company leader asks her to speak to groups of property investors about their services, she is overwhelmed.

In our session today, I turned on an iPhone video camera and lights.  I asked April to speak to me for one minute about her company. She could not get through 30 seconds before she froze up and stopped speaking. Then, I sat her down and guided her through a 10 minute grounding exercise. Afterwards, I asked her to stand up again to speak. She rose and walked to the center stage area, saying, “This feels totally different!” She spoke for almost two minutes, finding interesting new points to make, able to think through her thoughts and find ways to clarify her points. When she stopped speaking, she was ecstatic about what she just did. She exclaimed, “I felt so free, I could think and take my time, and I was so comfortable in my body! It was amazing!”

How to Solve Public Speaking Fear

Solving the problem of public speaking fear requires a special approach to public speaking training that has not yet been incorporated into most public speaking courses. Most speech teachers are teaching how to organize and deliver a talk, speech or presentation. While those are very valuable skills, they are not the solution to public speaking fear.

The solution is in learning to be comfortable being who they are at the center of attention. People with stage fright and fear of public speaking must first learn to be comfortable in their skin and present in front of groups.  That means learning how to relax deeply into their bodies and to accept themselves as they are in front of others. Only then will public speaking training work for people who have serious public speaking fears.

Once they are relaxed, self-accepting and present, then they can learn the skills to think their thoughts and say what they are thinking. Then, they find that speaking to groups gets really easy. At that point, it is easy for them to put some ideas together and their speech will flow as easily as it does when they talk one-on-one.

The Sandra Zimmer Method

How do I know all this is real and true? For 30 years, I have been facilitating groups of people who have serious stage fright and fear of public speaking.  The Sandra Zimmer Method guides them through a set of steps that allow them to be comfortable being who they are in front of others.  As a result, they connect to their natural abilities to express themselves in front of groups, so they speak as freely and fluidly as they do one-on-one.

I have trained thousands of people to develop a style of speaking that is authentic for each person.  They each develop a style of speaking based on being who they are, rather than who they think they should be.  What surprises everyone who participates is how easy speaking becomes. That’s because they already know how to speak; they just needed to release the tension of being the center of attention.

For more details on the steps of the Sandra Zimmer Method, please visit an article I wrote for www.presentation-guru.com. The article is entitled How to Overcome Fear of Public Speaking in 6 Mostly Easy Steps.

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Practice Breathing to Manage Public Speaking Fear

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Breathing to manage public speaking fear really works. However, it only works if you practice it regularly and integrate conscious deep breathing into daily activities. It is often called mindful breathing.

Every article you read on managing fear and anxiety for public speaking will suggest learning to breathe deeply and diaphragmatically. I concur that breathing is helpful, but only if you learn to breathe deeply and consciously while you are holding the center of attention and actually speaking. That means you have to be mindful of breathing in and out while speaking in front of others.

Yogis have the right idea for integrating breath into physical action. Yogis use breathing to manage stress and anxiety. In yoga, you move one way on an inhale and move another way on an exhale.  Sometimes in yoga, you move into a physical position, hold the position and breathe deeply into the part of the body you are holding.  Breathing in and out becomes integrated with movement and allows you to relax more deeply into the yoga practice.

When you become anxious or fearful, as in public speaking, you often stop breathing and hold the breath. You unconsciously hold the breath to keep yourself from feeling emotions and sensing physical sensations.  When the breath is not flowing smoothly, mind, body and spirit are separated. This creates a disconnection from self.  It results in feeling scattered and not all here, not present.

In order to use breath to stay calm and present when speaking, train yourself to breathe consciously while holding the center of attention and speaking.

 

How to Breathe Diaphragmatically

The best way I know to learn to breathe diaphragmatically is to start lying on your back on the floor. Put your knees up and feet flat on the floor. Inhale deeply and watch where the air goes in your body. When you lie down, you automatically breathe diaphragmatically. Notice how deeply your breath goes into the body without effort.

Place one hand on your navel and one on your upper chest. Allow the hand on your navel to rise as you inhale. Your belly will expand as you inhale and contract back down as you exhale. The hand on your upper chest will hardly move.

Now place your two hands on the sides of your bottom ribs, just above the waist.  As you inhale, notice how your ribcage expands and your hands are pressed outward.  As you exhale, your ribs contract back in and hands naturally come in.

Diaphragmatic breathing is deep into the navel and side areas because the breath fills the lower part of the lungs. Once you can feel this action of the breath, then sit up or stand up. Now breathe diaphragmatically. Feel the same action of expanding around the navel and sides when you inhale and contracting when you exhale.

 

How to Practice Breathing to Manage Public Speaking Fear 

Practice the following sequence of exercises to connect the breath to the body while in action.

  1. Breathe deeply during a simple task. While standing in line somewhere, focus attention on taking slow deep inhales and exhales. Notice you can feel yourself consciously present as you wait in line. Keep breathing even when you’re more forward in the line.
  2. Practice deep breathing while speaking on the phone. As you hold a conversation on the phone, stay conscious of taking deep slow inhales and exhales. Notice you feel your breath when listening to the person you are conversing with. Notice you are using your breath as you are speaking. You are always exhaling as you actually talk.
  3. Try breathing consciously as in exercise 2 during a face to face conversation.
  4. Use conscious breathing during a meeting where you are simply a participant.
  5. Try it during a meeting where you are leading the meeting. Notice how your breath flowing slowly and deeply helps you stay present and keeps your fear and anxiety way down. Maybe you even feel wonderful as you breathe, hold the center of attention and speak!

Work your way through these exercises slowly. Give yourself time to train your body and breath to coordinate during activities. Don’t expect yourself to be able to use your breathing to manage public speaking fear effectively in a few days. Yogis practice integrated breathing for years, so give yourself at least a few weeks.  You may be utterly surprised at how well this will work to help you manage the fear of public speaking.

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Learn to Speak Up in Public and Life Will Bring Opportunities to Share Your Gift

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If you are feeling dissatisfied with your life, it could be because you have not learned to speak up in public in order to fulfill your soul’s desire to make a difference. I believe we each have a gift to give the world. We each have some contribution to make that adds value to humanity and meaning to our lives. To give your gift fully always requires speaking about it in public.

Surprisingly, fear of speaking in public is one of the signs that you may have an important message to share that is valuable to others. After coaching thousands of individuals to overcome fear of public speaking, I realize that those individuals with public speaking fear turn out to be the most amazing speakers, because they are full of feelings and emotions. Their feelings and emotions are up to the surface and can be tapped to help them express with passion.

If you have a lot of public speaking fear, you have the potential to be a star at speaking! Here is the thing that will set you free. You don’t have to be the world’s greatest speaker. You don’t have to be perfect in order to make a big difference in the world. You only have to learn to speak up in public by being authentic, by simply being yourself.

I want you to know that when you learn to speak up in public, life will start bringing you the opportunities to give your gift. Your soul will use you to make the difference you feel called to make. You won’t have to struggle for it, you will only have to receive those opportunities and say yes.

Christine’s Story

Christine Gust

I had not heard from Christine Gust for several years. Christine called me this week to share that she had just spoken at the Colorado State House of Representatives. She said, “On Thursday I got to go to the State Capitol as part of my district’s day there. We observed the legislative process during the General Assembly, talked with House Leadership at lunch, and attended several committee hearings. I also gave my first testimony at a committee hearing. The bill was about amateur wine tasting contests. And my partner and I are amateur wine makers, so it was a perfect opportunity to share!”

Her voice was buoyant with excitement and pride for speaking up. She went on to say, “I have been feeling a desire to contribute to my community but didn’t know how to make it happen. When the opportunity arose to speak during my visit at the state capital, I was able to say yes. Years ago, I wouldn’t have had the courage to do this on the spot because I was terrified of speaking in public. But, your classes on Speaking from the Heart gave me the confidence to speak up on the spot!”

Christine recalled her notes from my Speaking from the Heart Group Speaking program to capture ideas quickly.  She remembered to ground herself to stay present and calm.  She allowed herself to speak from her heart without trying to be perfect.  she shared how her speech just flowed and how it much fun it was.  Mostly she was proud of herself for being able to say yes to contribute her ideas and to stand up for her beliefs and values in a public arena.

Here is the point I want to reiterate. Once you have learned to speak up in public, you automatically open the flow of support from your soul. Life can start bringing you lots of opportunities that you would have not attracted when you were not willing to speak up.  In a short time after her debut speaking up at the state capitol, Christine Gust was invited to speak at two other legislative committee meetings, one at the state level and one at the city level in Boulder.

Now she has the courage and confidence to accept the invitations coming her way. Christine is beginning to follow her soul’s passion to make a difference in the world. What difference can you make when you learn to speak up in public?

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Sandra Zimmer Method Workshop Overcomes Life-Long Discomfort of being Center of Attention

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 The Sandra Zimmer Method Workshop teaches you to convert public speaking fear, tension and anxiety into free flowing energy and excitement to speak.  You really can overcome life-long discomfort about being the center of attention! When you do, speaking becomes fluid and easy.

A participant in a recent Sandra Zimmer Method weekend workshop said, “Had I known I would overcome life-long discomfort at the center of attention in one day, I would have come to this workshop much sooner! I just did not know how easy this could be.”

The Sandra Zimmer Method is different from traditional public speaking courses. It does not lock you up in mechanical speaking techniques. Instead, Sandra Zimmer gently guides you to release tensions, anxieties and physical sensations that distract you from sharing your ideas freely.

In a completely nurturing and non-critical environment, in a small group of other supportive professionals who experience similar tensions, you learn to relax into being a natural speaker.

The result is that you feel comfortable to be yourself and confident to share your ideas, insights and expertise… in front of others! So, you can step into being the leader that you want to be.

 In this 3-day Workshop you learn how to:  

  • Release the tension of being the center of attention
  • Be comfortable in your skin in front of groups
  • Convert fear and anxiety into positive energy and enthusiasm
  • Develop an authentic leadership presence
  • Relax into creating genuine connection with listeners
  • Organize thoughts quickly for impromptu talks
  • Let your ideas and insights flow in impromptu talks

See Upcoming Workshop Dates

Workshop Times
Friday  2 – 6 pm
Saturday 10 am – 3 pm
Sunday  10 am – 2 pm

Location
Classes held at 11221 Richmond Ave. Suite C-104, Houston TX 77082

Workshop Fee: $795.00

For more information or to sign up for this transformational speaking workshop, call us at 281/293-7070.

Register on-line at self-expression.com

Limited to 8 participants, so sign up now!

Read an article about The Sandra Zimmer Method at www.presentation-guru.com

Workshop participants share how The Sandra Zimmer Method helped them succeed at speaking and presenting:

Your workshop has been the single most effective program that I’ve ever tried!  The very next week after returning from your program I presented in my Dale Carnegie class and won the “Outstanding Performance Award”.  In addition, I had to present an IP Telephony business case to Motorola’s CFO and CIO.    I felt comfortable….like I was speaking to a couple friends….and they seemed oddly comfortable too.  It was more of a success than I could have imagined!.  Immediately after I left the meeting, the CIO sent my team and Corp VP a note thanking us for the terrific job….and then thanked me specifically. I’ve really turned the corner in my 30 year battle with fear (excessive) of public speaking…..thanks to your work!   -D.R.

I want to tell you again how very much I enjoyed our two-day workshop Transform Stage Fright into Natural Presence. I had such a strong feeling during the workshop that I had found exactly the assistance I needed to move forward with developing my personal goals.   All the work felt like I was opening up as a speaker as I had not been able to do before. It was a wonderfully rich, emotional experience, and one I will not forget. -J.S.

I want to thank you for hosting the weekend workshop of “Transform Stage Fright”. We are routinely forced to close ourselves in the “outside” world because fear of doing something wrong, getting embarrassed, etc. Your class taught me to relieve the ego, open up, and feel comfortable being in the present moment. I have never felt that open and exposed in front of a large group of people, and it felt great. Within a day, I felt dramatically more comfortable and relaxed speaking impromptu in front of the class. In fact, I was so hyped up on the feeling of opening up, by the end of the day I was the one volunteering to get up and speak more! You are able to so easily connect and empathize with every single one of your students; it is beautiful thing just to be in your presence. As a young business professional I have been dealing with “stage fright” for years without any resolve. Your class is showing me there is help, and it doesn’t require any mechanics, books, or DVDs. It’s simply BEING YOU without any regret! – J.I.

When I felt God pressing strongly on my heart, He was directing me to speak. I questioned why He would suggest what I considered to be my weakness and one of my greatest fears. Regardless of my own doubt, I simply could not ignore God’s consistent request. After all, I was praying to Him for direction with a desire to fulfill my purpose in life. I knew if I had been chosen for a specific assignment, I would need to prepare myself. I mentioned my fear of speaking to my friend, Missy. Her face lit up with excitement as she exclaimed, “You must take Sandra Zimmer’s speaking class at the Self Expression Center. She is awesome, and she changed my life!” I signed up for the weekend class that very day. Sandra taught me how to convert my fear and anxiety into positive energy and excitement. I value and respect her method which is not focused on mechanics, but rather a genuine connection with an audience, co-workers or friends. It is authenticity that captures an audience. Sandra gave me the tools and confidence to effectively convey my experience. Sandra is another prayer that has been answered! Sandra Zimmer’s class was enlightening, soulful, spiritual, powerful and grounding. Her technique brought out the vulnerability in all of us, yet she had the expertise to convert the fear into a vehicle of empowerment. Her method is so authentic that our class was fueled by the positive energy that was created in the room, connecting all of us in the most beautiful and organic way. The classroom setting was the perfect example of what her technique will deliver to an audience. -K.S.

I just wanted to thank you so much for the instruction that you have given me through the small group and one on one.  My recent presentations went so well.  I was amazed at how the stage fright is not even there.  At both presentations I was complimented by individuals that have seen me present before.  They commented on what an impressive difference they observed. -M.R.

I gave my presentation this morning to the teenage group.  Before the presentation, I grounded myself by listening to your CD.  I was the most relaxed that I’ve ever been before a presentation.  I didn’t worry about how the words would come out, I just wanted to make sure that I shared the information that I needed to share with them.  For the first time in my life, I think I enjoyed giving a presentation. -U.W.

I have a presentation to give to one of our largest customers in the southern zone U.S. on April 15th, and I already find I am not nervous at all about the thought of doing so. This is definitely unusual even this far in advance.   – B.B.

 

Register Now
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Transform Stage Fright into Authentic Speaking Weekend Workshop with Sandra Zimmer

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Transform Stage Fright into Authentic Speaking Weekend Workshop teaches you to convert tension, fear and anxiety into free flowing energy and excitement to speak.  Really!

If tension about speaking in groups, meetings or presentations is holding you back, a Sandra Zimmer Method weekend workshop will free you to speak from your heart.

The Sandra Zimmer Method is different from traditional public speaking courses. It does not lock you up in mechanical speaking techniques. Instead, Sandra Zimmer gently guides you to release tensions, anxieties and physical sensations that distract you from sharing your ideas freely.

In a completely nurturing and non-critical environment, in a small group of other supportive professionals who experience similar tensions, you learn to relax into being a natural speaker.

The result is that you feel comfortable to be yourself and confident to share your ideas, insights and expertise… in front of others! So, you can step into being the leader that you want to be.

 In the Transform Stage Fright into Authentic Speaking Weekend Workshop, you learn how to:  

  • Release the tension of being the center of attention
  • Be comfortable in your skin in front of groups
  • Convert fear and anxiety into positive energy and enthusiasm
  • Develop an authentic leadership presence
  • Relax into creating genuine connection with listeners
  • Organize thoughts quickly for impromptu talks
  • Let your ideas and insights flow in impromptu talks

Two Transform Stage Fright into Authentic Speaking Weekend Workshop Options:

2 Consecutive Saturdays from 9:30 am – 3:00 pm both Saturdays

                                                      or

3 Consecutive Days – Friday 2-6 pm, Saturday 10-3 & Sunday 10-3

(All workshops are held at 11221 Richmond Ave. Suite C-104, Houston TX 77082)

Upcoming Workshop Dates

Read More FAQ about the Sandra Zimmer Method 

Read more about the 6 Steps to Overcome Fear of Public Speaking through the Sandra Zimmer Method at Presentation-Guru.com

 

Comments from Participants over 30 Years:

Your workshop has been the single most effective program that I’ve ever tried!  The very next week after returning from your program, I had to present an IP Telephony business case to Motorola’s CFO and CIO.    I felt comfortable….like I was speaking to a couple friends….and they seemed oddly comfortable too.  It was more of a success than I could have imagined!.  Immediately after I left the meeting, the CIO sent my team and Corp VP a note thanking us for the terrific job….and then thanked me specifically. I’ve really turned the corner in my 30 year battle with fear (excessive) of public speaking…..thanks to your work!   -D.R.

I want to tell you again how very much I enjoyed our two-day workshop Transform Stage Fright into Authentic Speaking. I had such a strong feeling during the workshop that I had found exactly the assistance I needed to move forward with developing my personal goals.   All the work felt like I was opening up as a speaker as I had not been able to do before. It was a wonderfully rich, emotional experience, and one I will not forget. -J.S.

I want to thank you for hosting the weekend workshop of “Transform Stage Fright”. We are routinely forced to close ourselves in the “outside” world because fear of doing something wrong, getting embarrassed, etc. Your class taught me to relieve the ego, open up, and feel comfortable being in the present moment. I have never felt that open and exposed in front of a large group of people, and it felt great. Within a day, I felt dramatically more comfortable and relaxed speaking impromptu in front of the class. In fact, I was so hyped up on the feeling of opening up, by the end of the day I was the one volunteering to get up and speak more! You are able to so easily connect and empathize with every single one of your students; it is beautiful thing just to be in your presence. As a young business professional I have been dealing with “stage fright” for years without any resolve. Your class is showing me there is help, and it doesn’t require any mechanics, books, or DVDs. It’s simply BEING YOU without any regret! – J.I.

When I felt God pressing strongly on my heart, He was directing me to speak. I questioned why He would suggest what I considered to be my weakness and one of my greatest fears. Regardless of my own doubt, I simply could not ignore God’s consistent request. After all, I was praying to Him for direction with a desire to fulfill my purpose in life. I knew if I had been chosen for a specific assignment, I would need to prepare myself. I mentioned my fear of speaking to my friend, Missy. Her face lit up with excitement as she exclaimed, “You must take Sandra Zimmer’s speaking class at the Self-Expression Center. She is awesome, and she changed my life!” I signed up for the weekend class that very day. Sandra taught me how to convert my fear and anxiety into positive energy and excitement. I value and respect her method which is not focused on mechanics, but rather a genuine connection with an audience, co-workers or friends. It is authenticity that captures an audience. Sandra gave me the tools and confidence to effectively convey my experience. Sandra is another prayer that has been answered! Sandra Zimmer’s class was enlightening, soulful, spiritual, powerful and grounding. Her technique brought out the vulnerability in all of us, yet she had the expertise to convert the fear into a vehicle of empowerment. Her method is so authentic that our class was fueled by the positive energy that was created in the room, connecting all of us in the most beautiful and organic way. The classroom setting was the perfect example of what her technique will deliver to an audience. -K.S.

I just wanted to thank you so much for the instruction that you have given me through the small group and one on one.  My recent presentations went so well.  I was amazed at how the stage fright is not even there.  At both presentations I was complimented by individuals that have seen me present before.  They commented on what an impressive difference they observed. -M.R.

I gave my presentation this morning to the teenage group.  Before the presentation, I grounded myself by listening to your CD.  I was the most relaxed that I’ve ever been before a presentation.  I didn’t worry about how the words would come out, I just wanted to make sure that I shared the information that I needed to share with them.  For the first time in my life, I think I enjoyed giving a presentation. -U.W.

I have a presentation to give to one of our largest customers in the southern zone U.S. on April 15th, and I already find I am not nervous at all about the thought of doing so. This is definitely unusual even this far in advance.   – B.B.

Registration Information

If you are interested in one of these programs,  call 281/293-7070.  Or Register on-line at:  self-expression.com

See Upcoming Workshop Dates 

Limited to 8 participants,  so sign up now!

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Listen Only to Those who Speak with Gravitas

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I made a decision this morning to listen only to people who speak with gravitas. The last couple days I have been watching the news on CBS This Morning.   Yesterday Samantha Powers sat with the CBS This Morning hosts, Charlie Rose, Nora O’Donnell and Gayle King.  Ms. Powers is the outgoing US Ambassador to the United Nations.  I was struck by Ms. Power’s voice, mannerisms and how carefully she spoke to articulate ideas that were well thought out and clearly intended to support the good of the whole world. She spoke with such gravitas that I hung on her every word.

What do I mean by gravitas? Gravitas is a special aspect of leadership presence that speaks from the deepest, wisest place inside that blends all sides of an issue. It speaks for the good of the whole. Gravitas is the quality of temperance, an integration state of being that bridges opposites between head, heart and soul.

One with gravitas senses the true needs of a situation with the goal of harmony, co-operation and relationship. People who embody gravitas, may come from various sides of an argument and may offer very different solutions to a situation, but they always show respect for all and intent to create harmony. People speaking with gravitas tend to be persuasive because others can sense their intention of harmony and the truth they speak.

In contrast, many people who are interviewed on the news, speak from reactive emotion or heady intellectualism. They usually talk too fast and stumble over words. I can tell the difference between a speaker who exudes gravitas and one who does not. I feel the difference in my body. Gravitas commands attention and respect and calls me to listen and consider. The absence of gravitas in a speaker just scrambles my body energy or my thoughts. I usually can’t understand what they mean because their words either make me unsettled in my gut or don’t go lower than my head.

So, I have decided to listen only to those who speak with gravitas. What if we all just listened and responded only to people who speak with gravitas? I wonder what harmony and relationships we might co-create!

For more ideas on gravitas, look at my gravitas and leadership presence webpage and video.

 

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Sandra Zimmer Method to Overcome Public Speaking Fear

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Recently, I wrote my most revealing article about the Sandra Zimmer Method to overcome public speaking fear and stage fright.

A Presentation Guru Requests an Article

The Commissioning Editor of Presentation-Guru.com, Jared Senseman, emailed to ask if I would write an article about my approach. Jared said Presentation-Guru was looking for unique approaches that help people speak and present more effectively.

Hesitant at first, I was afraid my approach would be too outside the box for www.presentation-guru.com. Jared was persistent, assuring me that his boss Jim Harvey, famed UK presentation skills trainer and author of Prezi, was curious about my approach. How could I refuse?

So, I set to work writing. I was inspired to share as much about the Sandra Zimmer Method to overcome public speaking fear and stage fright as I could. I wanted do three things with my article. 1) to reveal as many secrets of the Sandra Zimmer Method as possible. 2) to finally understand what it really takes to free the tension of public speaking fear and unleash natural ability to speak. 3) expose people with stage fright to the idea that their fears and anxieties can be tapped to help them shine when they speak to groups.

With Jared’s support and Jim Harvey’s magnificent editing, my article was published at www.presentation-guru.com on December 13, 2016. The title is “How to Overcome Your Fear of Public Speaking in 6 Mostly Easy Steps.”

 

The Article Opening

My Method to speaking in public focuses on transforming people who have a fear of public speaking into much more confident speakers. My clients are primarily business professionals who are good, often brilliant, at what they do, but who just aren’t comfortable sharing their ideas, insights and expertise in front of groups.

The process uses whole-person learning exercises, integrating physical, mental, emotional and spiritual aspects of the speaker so that he or she is speaking from presence rather than performance.  Presence is the unifying energy that connects all us humans into the experience of oneness. It is that state of consciousness where athletes find the zone, artists experience the flow state, people who are passionate lose the sense of time while doing what they love to do, and speakers flow their thoughts by speaking from the heart.

The Method was inspired by an experience I had on Maui in 1985 while acting on stage in the musical Camelot. I was right in the middle of my big show-stopping scene, walking across center stage, performing in front of 200 people, when I must have taken a deep, body-expanding breath. My belt, which snapped at the waist and held my entire costume together, UNSNAPPED!

My conscious awareness snapped into a state of presence unlike anything I had ever experienced as an actress…..

 

Read the whole article about the Sandra Zimmer Method to Overcome Public Speaking Fear at Presentation-Guru.com.

I am delighted to be among the authors writing for Presentation-Guru. To be included feels like an honor and an acknowledgement. My heart-felt thanks go to Jared who found me and Jim who mentored me with his smart editing!

For more about my Sandra Zimmer Method group speaking programs…

 

Read my Book or Get a Free Chapter “It’s Your Time to Shine: How to Overcome Fear of Public Speaking, Develop Authentic Presence and Speak from Your Heart”

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Gravitas – The Missing Quality for Powerful People who aren’t Being Promoted

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About Gravitas

Gravitas is about using your personal power in service to others and giving up the pleasure of asserting your power with a sharp voice tone.

J.S. contacted me and shared that he is strong technically, reports to the highest leaders in his company and gets great feedback that his expertise is valuable. He has also been told that he needs to work on developing more gravitas. It turns out that his power sometimes overpowers others, offending people when he does not mean to do so. He just wants to express all he knows.  J.S. said, “I just can’t hold back my energy when I have an important point to make!” He says he can’t help it if others are offended by his tone of voice.

The frustration for J.S. and other high-powered professionals like him is that they hit a perplexing glass ceiling where they aren’t being promoted to senior levels.  Even though they have the intelligence, the business solutions and the expertise to advance, they are often passed over for promotions. The problem is not one of lack of excellence, but lack of gravitas.

The Missing Quality and Skills to be Developed

What I believe is missing for some super powerful people is the ability to translate their power into service for the whole organization. That is gravitas. Many who are super powerful can’t hold themselves back from instantaneous expression. They think they just have to say it the way it is. That really turns others off because it sounds and feels sharp.

If you are one of the energetically super powerful, you may need to learn how to contain your powerful energy when you perceive a solution, mull it over in your mind and express it in a way that will be in service to the whole group. You must become more thoughtful and wise when expressing yourself. Without the middle part of the communication process where you consider what to say and how to say it carefully, others can’t trust you. They may admire your power and they certainly will fear you, but they can’t trust you because they don’t feel safe with you. Trust only happens when others know that you are considering their feelings and that your power is being used for the good of everyone.

Since I am sometimes one of these people who throw my communications at others too sharply, I have been exploring within my own consciousness how to develop gravitas. As one who teaches what I am here to learn, I have also been teaching groups on how to integrate the elements of gravitas into an already powerful style that will help leaders show up with gravitas. You may have read in one of my other posts or gravitas articles that gravitas is a rare leadership quality of power that comes from inner authority. People who exude gravitas take their time to consider things deeply and speak from the wisest place inside themselves for the good of the whole.

What to Give Up

In order to develop gravitas, you must sacrifice two qualities that are dearly held. The first thing to give up is the pleasure of speaking sharply. Sharpness in a leader makes him or her less likely to be promoted because it triggers such negative reactions in others. The tone of voice actually hurts others who are sensitive. The second thing to sacrifice is the tendency to think and talk fast.  You must slow down your speech and actions to consider thoughtfully how they will land with listeners. Slowing down gives you time to think and listeners time to process your meaning.

If you are like J.S., do a truthful self-assessment to articulate the qualities that you must sacrifice in order to begin to show up with gravitas.  If you’d like some coaching to cultivate gravitas as a part of your leadership style, here is a gravitas group program I offer in Houston. Individual coaching by phone or Skype is also an option for working with me on cultivating gravitas in your leadership style.

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Public Speaking Tip – 3 Techniques to Handle Hostile Audiences

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(Graphic by Vector Graphics)

Public speaking and presentation clients sometimes ask me how to handle hostile audiences. Frankly, I think people project more negativity onto audiences than is really there. Never the less, it is important to learn to stand openly before a group that includes people who may be judging, disagreeing or criticizing. I have three techniques to help transform a situation that involves hostile audiences.

First, allow people their own perspective and point of view. Give audience members permission to disagree with you, even to feel angry. Practice being like Teflon at the center of attention. Don’t let anything stick to you. Don’t make it about you personally, so there is nothing to defend. Instead, be open to hear their thoughts and allow the disagreement to exist without expecting them all to agree. Be curious about their perspectives.  Think or say, “Wow! I can understand your perspective. Tell me more.”

Second, look for a nurturing person in the audience and draw support from him or her.  Realize that groups of people organize themselves in a balanced way.  In any group, there will be someone who takes a supportive position and who will be seeing you with positive regard. Someone will be looking at you with the eyes of love and acceptance. Look around the room, find the person who is beaming support through his or her eyes and drink deeply of their attention. Allow yourself to feel their nurturing support.

Third, practice using a soft eye contact to see people in the group. Soft eye contact allows you to see people through the eyes of love and acceptance. Allow your eyes to become relaxed and slightly unfocused. Gently land your eyes on one person at a time, taking their attention in as though you are receiving their flow of attention and giving them permission to be who he or she is. This soft way of seeing people changes the quality of connection, sometimes even causing others to soften their approach to you. Because you are not resisting people, they can relax and soften as well.

None of us wants to speak in a hostile situation, but sometimes we must do so. These three techniques can help you transform the experience from confrontive to receptive. And that is hugely important in opening lines of communication in all aspects of life and business.

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